Sweet memories

I found the other day some old, black and white pictures from some time ago, when life was so different and I was just an innocent child that had no idea about the world and the challenge one has to face to fit in. Time when everything was only a happy game and a scoop of vanilla ice cream.

It all started with my mom and dad, they met, fell in love and got married June 22, 1975.

Mom and dad

And then on December 9, 1976 is when I came. I wonder what it was like to see the world at first? It’s a shame we don’t remember our thoughts as babies. No doubt everything was way too colorful and full with strange sounds.

6 months old

What I treasure the most from my childhood is my birthdays, mom’s homemade cakes and the family together. I have a album with pictures from each birthday, but the early photos in black and white are the ones I love very much.

First birthday, I was just walking and apparently I ended up stepping inside the cake.

Someone had the brilliant idea to take a picture of me and the cake on the floor, no one of course expected me to stand up and go boldly for the cake.

Second birthday photos are mostly with funny faces I’ve made and everyone having fun with me.

2 years old

with mom, second birthday

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I miss often those years when we would play outside all day, at granny’s house or on the street and it would be absolutely safe to do so.

Today kids play with PSP and video games, you can’t see them running on the streets freely, holding piece of bread in one hand and wooden stick in the other.

Lifestyle has changed so much and the charm of being a kid is somehow gone. I remember my brother and I had very few toys, but we loved them very much. Now kids have cupboards full of toys and none of them appreciated.

I didn’t have Barbie, with communism in Bulgaria much of the Western products were not on the market, but I had Russian dolls, two, Masha and Natasha.

Natasha turned into flying body parts after a “friendly” game with my brother, but Masha is still alive, at home, in my room. Not with her original dress, but a dress mom made for her, because I decided to try my drawing skills on the white dress Masha had, with a permanent marker and then when I didn’t like it and I tried to wash the marker away, surprise … the dress was ruined. There were some tears, that I remember.

Father Christmas was rather scary than pleasant person … Guess what’s inside the box? Masha :)

To make me do things I don’t want to do, big mistake …

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I always wanted to grow up fast, to be a “big” person with responsibilities and personal life, but sometimes when I remember the days back, I think I could use some of the innocence of the childhood and the moments when all I had to care about was a game with Masha or Natasha and a lovely hug from my parents.

And since turning back the time is not possible, I’m glad, I at least have these sweet memories …

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My brother’s 4th birthday, with mom and dad.

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© 2011 Broken Sparkles

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Great expectations

Expectation is what is considered the most likely to happen, presumed degree of probability of an occurrence.

Sometimes I wonder, how come most great expectations turn out to be not so great, not so worth reaching them? How come when you wait for something to happen, when you dream, pray and suffer about it, the result is inadequate and mixed with disappointment?

I am sure all of us, at least once, have thought that certain event, certain person will give us certain comfort and pleasure and on the end none of it would appear on the surface. You think of a smile and eyes with blessing and love, but harsh voice and rough action is what you get! You see in your day-dreaming peace and serenity, but the reality is knocking you with its absence.

There was a time, when I’d feel sad and frustrated if my expectations were not met with the expected result, when I’d sit awake at night and wonder “Why?”, looking for the answers under my pillow or in between the sheets of anxiety …  now I just count it as an experience, as a lesson I had to learn and I move on to the next expectation, hoping that it will be a better one!

Happy Hump Day everyone! I hope the beginning of this week brought you something beautiful to dream about!


© 2010  Broken Sparkles


End of summer

I started “Scent of my heart” so I could share my poems with other people apart from my close friends. So far I am happy with my blog considering it’s really newborn and I must say one more time – thank you Tom Baker for finding me and introducing me to people like Cherlyn from “Over a Cup of Coffee”, it’s always nice to meet people all over the world.

Originally I thought that I will share only poems, because more or less the poem I post says about the day I had, the way I feel, but today I feel like having something different than a poem … it’s going to be my different post every Wednesday of every week. Why Wednesday? Well first Wednesday is my favorite day of the week and second I like the American way of saying :” Happy Hump Day- Happy middle of the week!”

I woke up this morning to find out that the chilly wind is back again. A week ago temperatures dropped down and I thought: ” Oh, the summer is going away!”, but then after few days it was sunny and hot again … until this morning- when my bare feet felt the cold marble floor, which usually in the heat is so nice to walk on to, when having coffee outside on the balcony wasn’t pleasant without a jumper.

I love summer! Having in mind I was born and I have lived for 24 years in a country with very deep winters, mountains of snow and minus degrees, against all odds I just love summer and heat. I absolutely adore the strong sun, the smell of sand and salty water in the air, the light clothes, the long days, the hot nights with open windows and the sound of singing insects. I love Athens in august. It’s really hot, but empty. No traffic, no buses full of people, no politics working in the parliament to accept unacceptable laws to make people to strike, demonstrate and block the roads unhappy and angry with the government, just happy tourists exploring the town, speaking different languages, taking photos …

This summer was a great summer for me. I managed to free myself from all feelings and people making me suffer, I managed to feel myself again, confident and happily smiling, I went on a trip to London and I sure felt really royal visiting palaces and historical monuments, I spent a week on a Greek island enjoying the sea and the beach, I filled myself with energy to face the winter that will come soon.

And today feeling the cold it made me a bit sad … I wish the summer lasted a bit more … I wish I had for a bit more the sun- tanned skin and my painted toe- nails in sandals. But they say nothing really lasts forever and I guess that goes and for summer …

How about you? Do you have a favorite season?

I hope all of you had a very good start of the week and it will end even better! Happy Hump Day world!

Me on the beach in Eretria,Evia – summer 2010

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© 2010  Broken Sparkles

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